alok vaid menon funeral poem

So color is part of that. Other factors that can affect speaker fees include the talent's schedule, market conditions, length of presentation, and the location of the event. Just a moment while we sign you in to your Goodreads account. Next Thing: This month, Mx. It became about being seen in a different way. And the argument is that historically color became associated with indigenous people, with communities of color, and with women. Similar motivational celebrity speakers are Shane Ortega, Geena Rocero, Chris Mosier, Angelica Ross and Kylar Broadus. Trans activist and actress Laverne Cox and actor Billy Porter both shared clips from the episode. ALOK VAID-MENON (they/them/theirs) is an internationally acclaimed writer, performer, and public speaker. They later added that people need to have compassion before "comprehension" meaning they need to have empathy for trans people even if they don't understand them. They share with us their spirituality, poetry, and what it means to live beyond the gender binary. I was paying so much attention to the ways in which I was discriminated against that I forgot to pay attention to the ways in which I was already free. With every tear I am seeing the miracle of body. When I see things that I love, when I learn new things, when I read new books, when I encounter new ideas, I want to share it with everyone in the world. Alok Vaid-Menon in Oxfordshire, England, on Nov. 22, 2019. Stuart C. Wilson / Getty Images for The Business of Fashion Nonbinary activist Alok Vaid-Menon broke down the history of and problems with the gender binary and how people can fight against it in video that has gone viral on social media. "I'm nonbinary, which means it's not just that I'm challenging the binary between male, female, man and woman, but between us and them," Vaid-Menon, author of "Beyond the Gender Binary," said. Beauty is about looking like yourself, even in the face of social and cultural repression. Or is this someone else? Big Break: This summer, Mx. And what most people dont know is that one of the tactics of colonization was the attempted cultural genocide of these populations. And Im your host, Laurie Anderson. I was feeling and being. "I'm nonbinary, which means it's not just that I'm challenging the binary between male, female, man and woman, but between us and them," Vaid-Menon, author of " Gender diversity is an integral part of our existence. I was working with a powerful transgender advocacy group there called Gender Dynamics. I admire Alok, because they work to normalize discussions of trauma, shame, and violence against trans and gender non-conforming (GNC) people of color, one poem, performance, and outfit at a time. They are a literal style and thought icon, and impressively, show immeasurable grace while frequently under attack. In her eyes my journey was about hurting her, not about healing myself. It was a dance that I wanted to stage for my own community. For more information on how we work and what makes us unique, please read the AAE Advantage. Two people can look similar and be completely different genders. In this sculpture, the Buddhas right hand is depicted touching the ground as he calls the earth to witness his triumph over the demon Mara. your salt rubbed on our wounds. Music for Awaken was created by Blue Dot Sessions, Podington Bear, Tendinite and Siddhartha Corthus. Support Button Poetry: http://bit.ly/buttonpatreonSubscribe to Button! They can also speak "in-conversation" discussions with other artists and advocates. WebALOK they/them author. I think for me it also takes the form of style. On their website, they have almost 200 poems and blog posts with titles ranging from cis feminisms double standards to The Grief of Having No Language to Express Your Grief. And I ask myself, is this me, or is this someone else? The way hair grows back, scabs heal, lips kiss. Because the thing is, you have revelations about yourself, but youre not ready yet to live those revelations. And so then I put this brown body in a pink shirt, and what did that do? Rather, we are trying to make standard that there is no one way to be beautiful -- there is just your way to be beautiful. ALOK (they/them) is an internationally acclaimed writer, performer, and public speaker. Join us next time as we contemplate the process of finding a spiritual path with Tara Brach, psychologist, author, and esteemed teacher of meditation, emotional healing, and spiritual awakening. For more information about our guest and to see images of the artwork in this episode, visit RubinMuseum.org/awakenpod. And so much of the formalization and consolidation of European-Western modernity was also a project of aesthetics and color. Like Im going to let a couple finish, but its the after-party for me. Are you willing to go back to living someone elses lie? as if this struggle is not your struggle. The same applies to their hair style. In the early 20th century, when women were advocating for the right to vote, men created postcards that showed women dressed up as men and men dressed up as women, Vaid-Menon said. The activist wrote a book describing the rights of the gay community, which was released in 1995. Science Says No. I sacrificed so much. Because before I could speak, I could gesture. In this performance-lecture ALOK presents a 21st century approach to gender rights, calling for an end to the gender binary. And I had to basically stay at home and I started to really write. We are happy to help! Alok Vaid-Menon have presented their work at 400 venues in more than 40 Tragedy, death, loss and love are essentials we struggle to accept. Their work as a leading figure in the movement for gender fluidity takes them from starring in HBOs "The Trans List" (2016) and "Random Acts of Flyness" (2018), to designing three gender-neutral fashion collec-tions, to modeling for New York Fashion Week and Vogue editorials, and to gracing the stages of venues such as Beautycon, the New York Times Global Assembly, and SXSW to speak about overcoming marginalization and self-acceptance. By creating an account, you agree to our Privacy Policy. not, 'Can you help me help you?'" Criticism of Alok Vaid-Menon's (popular spoken word artist I am proud to be part of a generation of artists who are challenging mainstream beauty and showing the world that niche is the new norm. He asked what he needs to "unlearn" and what he needs to do to help other men unlearn, in order to better support them, referring to trans and nonbinary people like Vaid-Menon. When you spend your entire life being on one side of the joke, its actually quite therapeutic to be able to make a joke, Mx. And I think that I still practice that commitment for better or for worse. comedian. but instead i will sit here and wait until the train starts up again.i will exit the car without saying goodbye to her.i will walk up the stairs to the boy outside with the smile that makes me feel less lonely. In the author's words it "is a dream of what it could look like to celebrate transfemininity in public both in ourselves and for the people who desire us (by which I mean: everyone, across time, always)." And I caught fire, which is intense. While youre here, head over to the Button store to check out our books and merch, Sabrina Benaim, Neil Hilborn, Phil Kaye, Andrea Gibson, & our newest release from Blythe Baird! I describe putting together an outfit as making an altar on my body. I see interconnectivity with nature, the earth, humanity, and a deep practice of humility. And then you acting like a fool, that gives me permission to be a fool. And I had to alchemize it and hack at it. "Women were basically just saying, 'We want the right to vote,' and men heard that as 'Im losing power,'" they said. What am I feeling in this moment? We will send you a reminder message with your password. I wept: for her, and for me. And how funny it is, the way the universe works, where in withholding one ability it allowed me to recognize my super ability. Nonbinary activist Alok Vaid-Menon broke down the history of and problems with the gender binary and how people can fight against it in video that has gone viral on social media. You know, I think that theres a lot of misapprehension, miscomprehension about people like me. Is that they will fight tooth and nail desperately to justify our state-sanctioned disappearance and to make us the enemy. WebCome here to share slam poems, or talk about slam! Despite constant invalidation, so many transgender people transition because we know there is a quiet and fierce dignity to being able to look at yourself and say "this is who I am.". Because thats the substance of life itself. As a mixed-media artist ALOK uses poetry, comedy, lecture, performance, fashion design, and visual art to explore themes of gender, race, trauma, belonging, and the human condition. Could it be that we actually are practicing something thats so important and organic and necessary that its more important than that? And what I gained was my life back. That we all give and receive violence to varying degrees, but that this is not a fairy tale. Toward the start of the conversation, Heath told Vaid-Menon that when he listens to them speak, he asks himself, "Why do I not fight for them?". Theres so many turning points. And its just idiosyncratic and strange and utterly uncinematic. Because there are things more important to me than that. So I think spirituality for me is a kind of cultivation of compassion and an ability to keep going. No one else should be able to tell you who you are; thats for you to decide., We want a world where boys can feel, girls can lead, and the rest of us can not only exist but thrive. Although I am constantly harassed for it, I am able to keep going because I know who I am. I guess the academic in me would say, I felt like I was no longer a subject. I feel like every day is an artistic and spiritual endeavor to be what is. Diversity and inclusivity are not just industry buzzwords. Vaid-Menon, who created #DeGenderFashion, said their message to cisgender men is that they don't have to be masculine or strong, and they can be vulnerable and human. As a subscriber, you have 10 gift articles to give each month. And Im your host, Laurie Anderson. That response has deep historical roots, they said, noting that they've studied gender, sexuality and sociology at Stanford University. The work of soul searching came to me through being an artist. All American Entertainment has successfully secured celebrity talent like Alok Vaid-Menon for clients worldwide for more than 20 years. "They've repressed their own femininity. Our agents find the right fit for your event, Full access to all speakers & celebrities, Your personal Logistics Manager who takes care of all event details. One of my favorite things was going to weddings and seeing intergenerational dancing. All rights reserved. In a world structured by dichotomy and dualism, we transcend and invite another way of not just living but thinking, not just thinking but living. Yes, but what kind of beauty do I want to make? That hatred you feel when you see us having the audacity to live a life without compromise, that hatred is for yourSELF.". (check all that apply). WebAmanda and Liam Lezra. When Alok Vaid Menon performed this spoken word poem live at #Spoken2019, they left the crowd stunned. So it means that Im kind of ambivalent about form and Im more invested in flow. Mx. our train is delayed and i am late for lunch with a boy i like because he makes me feel less lonely and that seems like a sufficient definition for love Founder of TransTech Social Enterprises & Actress in the FX Attorney, Author & LGBTQ Rights Activist; Motivational Television Host & Culture Expert on Netflix's "Queer Eye", Transgender Activist, Actor & TED Resident. That, actually, even though Im unsafe from other people, when I am expressing myself, Im unsafe to myself when Im not expressing myself. Vaid-Menon later said when they talk about challenging traditional gender ideology, cisgender men often feel threatened. And I can feel it there in the way that I move. And thats what were seeing, unfortunately, in 2021. She eventually passed on without ever seeing me as myself. "And in your statement, you said, 'Why don't I help them?' But, in my experience, a commitment to honest self-actualization yields unparalleled peace and conviction. AAE Named to Inc. Best Workplaces in 2022. "Orange is the New Black" star Cox wrote, "@alokvmenon with the full sermon. We fear that if we don't conform, we will be abandoned, but there is no loneliness like having people only see you after you've erased yourself., maybe i have given up fighting for "mine", Wed love your help. WebALOK VAID-MENON: I sacrificed so much. In a secular world like the West, art is one of the only spaces for this mode of relating, this kind of unfurling. We tell them that they are not real. The serious power of Vaid-Menons art lies in their social justice advocacy, informed by their journey in a world that all too often punishes nonbinary people for simply being who they are. P.S. Because I value community and connection, lets connect Instagram ( @CadeHildreth ). Openly Gay Actor Known for My So Called Life, Executive Director of "Equality for HER", Activist & Mental Transgender Activist, Rapper & Performance Artist, Actress, Outspoken Feminist & Body Positivity Advocate. Vaid-Menon said. They are the author of Femme in Public (2017), Beyond the Gender Binary (2020), and Your Wound/My Garden (2021). It felt like the body was a mere suggestion. I dont need you to show up to 'protect' me," Porter wrote on Instagram. Alok Vaid-Menon Finds Beauty Beyond Gender, https://www.nytimes.com/2021/12/04/style/alok-vaid-menon-artist-nonbinary-poet-activist.html. The word artist is one of possibility, not constriction, they said. People have been taught to fear the very things that have the potential to set them free. 0 coins. Addeddate 2016-11-04 00:33:48 Closed captioning no Duration 199 Identifier Reincarnation_-_Alok_Vaid-Menon So because I couldnt go out and dance, because I couldnt go distract myself, because I was in pain, I had to sit with the pain, and I had to make something out of it. AWAKEN is produced by the Rubin Museum of Art in collaboration with Sound Made Public. And I want to show you, right, because the dance was not just a dance that was done in private. Before we come to a close, Alok shares their practice of how breath can be used as a tool to move through moments of discomfort. Vaid-Menon explores ideas through poetry and nonfiction, but also through fashion, virtual book clubs and live performances. "I don't need your help," they said, adding that they "have an unshakable and irrevocable sense of who I am" and don't need to prove anything. And so I think I lost that fluidity. #degenderfashion love & need you contact@alokvmenon.com that we may wonder what itwould mean to have peopleempathize with our sufferingfor once in our goddamn lifewhat it would feel liketo hold the captive attentionof a funeral of strangers. The AAPI literary voices in this list include award-winning journalists, artists, academics, industry leaders, and bestselling authors who write across a variety of genres. We speak with internationally acclaimed, gender non-conforming writer, performer, and public speaker Alok Vaid-Menon, whose work speaks to themes of trauma, belonging, and the human condition. so i want to embrace to this woman on the trainand say: i am afraid too say: remind me trustsay: sometimes this silence feels like the highest pitch of screaming. For the most current fee to hire Alok Vaid-Menon, please fill out the. What kind of person do I want to be? When he overcame these forces, the Buddha was able to achieve enlightenment. And you see someone who you never thought dance, could dancean 85-year-old, just with this kind of unbridled sense of possibility in every step and gesture. It felt like I didnt have a body anymore. Its the willful unnoticing. So the goal has always been about elimination of us. Fill out the booking request form or call our office at 1.800.698.2536, and one of our agents will assist you to book Alok Vaid-Menon for your next private or corporate function. Search instead in Creative? And I remember speaking it and being like, whoa, this is what I, not just what I want to do for the rest of my life, but this is what I am. And then people began to tell me that the way that I moved my body was wrong, because it was feminine. And at least for now I say no. For more information about our guest and to see images of the artwork in this episode, visit AWAKEN Podcast. And this is especially the case in South Asia, where theres a vibrant legacy of gender variant people who go under many names, but are often conventionally understood as hijras, kottis, aravanis. So who am I going to prioritize? But whose standards of beauty are we required to adhere to? And the alchemic work of rematerializing what was into what could be is the work of being alive, I think. In her eyes my journey was about hurting her, not about healing myself. Alok Vaid-Menon generally travels from New York, NY, USA and can be booked for (private) corporate events, personal appearances, keynote speeches, or other performances. In some cases, the actual quote may be above or below the stated range. She is the partner of comedian Kate Clinton. Copyright 2023 All American Speakers Bureau. They tell us to be ourselves, but if you listen closely, theres more to that sentence: . "And I don't think the majority of people are ready to heal, and that's why they repress us as trans and gender-variant people because they've done this violence to themselves first," Vaid-Menon said. But there are so many more important questions to be asked when a child is born, such as: Hows your baby doing? or How can I support you during this time? or Why is it so expensive to raise kids? Or maybe even Where can I donate to help?, Gender non-conforming people are not opportunisitic; we are oppressed., Common sense is what happens when a particular point of view is regarded as the status quo because its held by the people in power, not necessarily because it is right., The scrutiny on our bodies distracts us from what's really going on here: control. So it was summer 2012 in Cape Town, South Africa. Is this my own gender? ALOK is a dynamic and seasoned presenter who excels in tailoring their message to their audience from college students to corporate boardrooms. I think that I always want to remember and teach the world that I was born with a heart, two lungs, two eyes, no shame. It didn't work. And that feels like a spiritual practice. ", They said though trans and nonbinary people face violence and death for challenging traditional gender norms, they don't want people to fight for their rights "because you want to protect me or you want to help me.". I was no longer an individual. Goodreads helps you follow your favorite authors. Beauty is no longer in the eyes of the beholder. say: these past thirty minutes were the first time i have been forced to publicly grieve death in a long timeand there is somethingbeautiful about that say: what if we stopped moving more often, took a second to absorb the pain,let it fill us a little less empty. Why do engrained beauty standards so often require some of us to become invisible in order to make other people feel more comfortable? Is this my own beauty? The sight of me walking with my head high -- brown, bearded, and in a bold red lip -- was too much for them. People have the right to self-determine their gender whether it be a man, woman, or a nonbinary gender. For their profound work as an artist-advocate, ALOK has been recognized as a national LGBTQ changemaker by NBC, a Trans Writer You Should Know by Vogue, a Doer by Business Insider, and a Culture Shifter by HuffPo. We thought fitting in would give us securitybut is it security when someone else living their life differently unsettles us to our very core?, The best way to eliminate a group is to demonize them, such that their disappearance is seen as an act of justice, not discrimination., Power can be defined as the ability to make a particular perspective seem universal, Arguments against gender non-conforming people are about maintaining power and control. And in so many ways, the enduring forms of harassment that I experience are the universe asking me this question over and over again. . Theres, in fact, a third way. And I woke up in flames. For many, the path to enlightenment begins by acknowledging suffering but not letting it define who we are. Leaving us a review is one of the best ways to help this podcast reach more listeners like you. i will apologize for being late.i will not have the words for a type of loss that is so distant it is intimate.after lunch later i will get back on the train.i will remember. *Disclaimer: Nothing on this site should be construed as medical, health, or financial advice. Eyes on the Prize: Fashion plays an important role in Mx. Gender is not what people look like to other people; it is what we know ourselves to be. It was one and the same. #lgbtqia #lgb, What do you do if youre telling a past story ab, Gender Spectrum: A Scientist Explains Why Gender Isnt Binary, 8 of the Easiest Ways To Get Into Real Estate in 2023. LAURIE ANDERSON: Welcome to AWAKEN, a podcast presented by the Rubin Museum of Art in New York City. School, Vaid-Menon explained to me, was difficult, and they needed an outlet. How are you supposed to be believed about the harm that you experience when people don't even believe that you exist? Acclaimed gender non-conforming writer, performer, and speaker, ALOK, shares their story, and the stories of those who came before them, with an urgency that invites us to step into our power and the power of interdependence. Our agents are happy and able to submit an offer to the speaker or celebrity of your choice, letting you benefit from our reputation and long-standing relationships in the industry. by their tongues. . Claim to Fame: Mx. But what I like about a wedding dance party is everyone is just being gnarly and foolish and playful. Our agents are happy and able to submit an offer to the speaker or celebrity of your choice, letting you benefit from our reputation and long-standing relationships in the industry. IE 11 is not supported. Buddha taught that suffering is part of the human experience, but he also taught that theres a way out. we have been taught to fear the very things that have the potential to set us free, Its not just that you internalize the shame; rather, it becomes you. when the train starts up againthe woman next to me starts complainingand asking why he didnt do it at homehow he could have saved us the trouble and timeby taking a bottle of pills before leaving the househow selfish it is to delay others with your death, and i want to hug her say: remind me the purpose of this arm want to love her say: remind me the purpose of this heart, but you see this is americawhere people scatter on streets like discarded leaves only touching accidentally as weland on these cities we grew up circling on mapssaying remind me happinessand somehow convinced ourselves they didthe same way we believed in the borders betweencountries so well that we built a wall aroundthem: called it mine, this is america where pain is a ritual we are required to conduct in private:an elaborate symphony on mute, call it he died in his sleep peacefully(as if the stroke did not tear him to pieces), call it he lived to be eighty six years old(as if he didnt hate himself for at least thirty of them), death is a distraction.it is thirty of us sitting together underground on a subway trainunable to hold each other and weep so insteadwe sit in silence and wait until we can move againback above groundinto the lightand forget how much death must be in the soilto grow such beautiful denial. Special thanks to Alok Vaid-Menon for sharing their experience with us. If you are the talent and wish to request a profile update or removal from our online directory, please submit a profile request form. For so long I lived my life within society's constraints of who I was supposed to be. Call us to speak with a booking agent about your event or specific speaker request. I used to love dancing, and I think dance was my first language. Then I convened a group of us at the end of that summer and I recited it to them. Vaid-Menon is self-publishing a poetry book called Your Wound/My Garden. At the beginning of my career I was really concerned with detailing the nature of the wound that I had in the world, Mx. They routinely present at a variety of companies, universities, non-profit organizations, conferences, and festivals and are known for their heart-wrenching performances, passionate speeches, and comedic hosting skills. I would tell everyone, Im going to grow up and Im going to be a dancer. Color became language. And then I ask it until I can remember that the shame was not my own. But I am seeing the ways that my fingers are phoenixes, becoming touch again. The team at All American Entertainment represents and listens to the needs of organizations and corporations seeking to hire keynote speakers, celebrities or entertainers for speaking engagements, personal appearances, product endorsements, or corporate entertainment. . i will soon forget. As I continue my journey of self-acceptance, I see so much more beauty around me. Diversity and inclusivity are not just industry buzzwords. They've repressed their own creativity.". When in fact we are guilty of the crime of being alive and meaning it. I just was. Support Button Poetry: http://bit.ly/buttonpatreonSubscribe to Button! WebDo you know who you are outside of who you have been told you should be? Alok Vaid-Menon have Our booking agents have successfully helped clients around the world secure talent like Alok Vaid-Menon for both live and virtual events for over 20 years. Vaid-Menon is a gender nonconforming artist, writer and comedian who uses their work to redefine beauty standards, examine colonialism and explore fluid identity. Robot". Let's figure it out. To have relationship with our beauty thats our own beauty? What kind of energy do I want to be a part of? And so, what I guess Im trying to cultivate in my life is the kind of courage and conviction and stamina to continue every day to ask myself, Who am I? I see peace and serenity and surrender and acceptance of what is. WebAlok Vaid-Menon is a keynote speaker and industry expert who speaks on a wide range of topics such as Keynotes, Endowed Lectures & Commencement Addresses, Beyond the They've repressed their own gender nonconformity. Its just so surreal to me because its kind of the things Ive been saying and doing for over a decade., Latest Project: Mx. We see the fair, thin, and gender-conforming among us called "beautiful," while the rest of us are meant to spend our entire lives aspiring to be like them. I dont know if Ill ever be able to account for the grief of it, but I think that what I can do and what I hope to do is to believe that healing is possible. For an optimal experience visit our site on another browser. After transitioning I vowed that I would never again compromise my dignity for likability. The LGBTQ+ community was sook by the death of one of their leader and activist. in america!(i understand), the ways we have been taughtto apologize for our sadness.to blame ourselves for the hurt.to erase the violence.to numb the pain.to normalize the death.to wake up in the morning anddeny that sometimes when thetrain crawls into the station thatwe may see a pill in its place. Normative beauty is insecure. It was a dance that I later staged at my school talent show, for better or for worse. Fill out a, Booking fees for Alok Vaid-Menon, or any other speakers and celebrities, are determined based on a number of factors and may change without notice. Alok uses the pronoun they and has received international attention for Alok Vaid-Menon in Oxfordshire, England, on Nov. 22, 2019. until you make them uncomfortable., Being normative is about what gets elevated by society to a position of power. We silenced our own differences, subdued our creativity, and toned down our own gender non-conformity in order to fit in.
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